To Bidet Or Not to Bidet, That Is The Question?

So I recently had the pleasure of attending the opening of a new bistro(it was my first outing since the coma) for a brunch with about 75 of my closet peeps!

As I was sitting there enjoying this very special morning, just being there, alive, awake...signing autographs, having photo ops, air-kissing like crazy, getting a hug like every 5 minutes, and being the center of every ones universe again... all was right with the world.

I was walking with a cane as my legs had grown weak from being in the coma.  My cane was rather spectacular, as it was a metallic red along the shaft, and had a rather large Diamond on the top of it.  I was wearing a new outfit, which had been designed just for Moi!

My hair was down just past my perky tata's, my ass needed a slight lift, but with the help of duct tape and a new girdle I was looking radiant.  My skin was clear and line free as always.

I learned that while I was in the coma, the hospital staff would call me "Sleeping Beauty" as they checked on me.

Anywho...

Our food was delivered to our table and glasses were being poured full with bubbly and everyone was laughing and rejoicing all around me.  It was an exceptional moment to behold.

And then I saw him.  He appeared as if out of the air.

He smiled at me, nodded his head and placed his hand on his heart.  I felt my face grow warm and red, and then that old familiar sturrin' from down under...

As I arose from my seat, everyone stood up and wanted to assist Moi to the restroom.  The manager of the lovely bistro offered me the use of his private restroom.  I walked in smiling and wincing to try and look gracious and to stop the cramps... I locked the door behind me, and attempted to run to the toilet.  I made it just in time, I guess my inners were not yet working perfectly yet.  I sat there as I relieved myself, sweating and thinking......why am I always in a restaurant when this shit happens?

I soon realized in horror that there was no paper on the rolls.  WTF!   I had left my cell phone on the table, so  there would be no S.O.S.  I sat there thinking....mmmmm...Divine Man, you have been through far worse then this...so I thought... when is France, one must do what the French do... use a Bidet!   I very carefully lifted my sagging ass up on top of the sink and turned the warm water on.

I gotta say, it felt amazing!  It felt so good that I sat there for about 20 minutes or so....finally I realized that there were people on the other-side of the door pounding in frantic to make sure I was ok.

A Year Lost....Moving Forward

It's been 26 days since I opened my eyes on New Years Eve.  My memory is a bit fuzzy, confused and trying to remember what was just dreams versus reality.  Having to relive the loss of my Diva Girl all over again, coming home to an empty house, adjusting to life alone.

The night I woke up, in all the confusion of the Dr's and Nurses running around me and the machines beeping etc... I saw him standing there smiling and watching tears drip down his face.  In all the commotion all I could see was him.  Just him.  It was as if time had stopped, the space around us was just us, and yet he was so far from me at the same time.  I knew that he was with me, finally ...again after so long....

I was released from the hospital a few days later, my parents brought me to my penthouse, stayed with me until I forced them to leave.  I needed time alone...funny really, I was alone for a whole year, trapped in my body.  I guess I now needed to begin my life anew.  Reclaim the life I had, accept what had happened, what had changed and to embrace a new chapter.

A favorite quote of mine is:  When one door closes, another one opens!

The Awakening...The Homecoming!

I held as tight as I could to his hand, And as I did my eyes began to flutter and my eye sight was blurry.  It took about 200 blinks before my eyes were clear to see the man in front of me.

We were fixed on each other, our eyes locked tightly on the other and he just simply held my hands and he smiled at me.

I slowly began to move my lips and try to speak my first words in over a year.  I wanted to scream out joy, laugh, giggle, for I was finally awake!

As I moved my lips I was able to slowly get out the following....Is it you, are you him?
He replied...yes my love it is me, Astor.  I so very grateful to the Gods for bringing you back to me, to all of the people that love you so.

Everything happened so fast, the Doctor's were running around me, the nurses and other specialists. They made him wait out in the hallway.  Not long after my parents were there at my side.  We were all smiling and weeping tears of joy.  My Mom and Dad were simply glowing with pure joy.

Once they stopped holding me like they were gonna choke me I began to focus my thoughts...

I asked " How is Iris"?  how's my baby?  How is my Diva Girl?

The Awakening...A Love Beyond Time...SOMETHING amazing...

He seemed to come and go, he did not stay away more then what I felt was minutes. He kept coming back to me.  He took my hands in his tightly. He spoke of:  You need to remember how our love began...We met a number of centuries ago, we were both young, 20 and 24.  I fell in love with you the moment we met.  Our eyes met, locked for what seemed like hours.

I courted you, pursued you for weeks, and you pretended not to be intrigued with me, alas you were. We saw each other weekly, then day by day, and then one particular night...I arranged for you to  meet me for dinner via a horse drawn sleigh. The snow was falling gently that night, you arrived and walked out of the sleigh.

You were a vision in a red gown, with detailed beading and your hair was curled up on your head of perfection.  We had dinner and then went back to my Inn.  We proceeded to make love for the first time.

Please wake up my love, please return to me.  Please ....Our Love is ....A Love Beyond Time.

As he sat there holding my hands, I realized there was a chime that had begun to ring, It was New Years Eve...

At that moment my body felt energized and renewed, I was remembering him, me, us... our life together, and then...

He bent down to my face, his warmth and scent were intoxicating as was the heat from his lips as they slowly met mine.  He gently began to press his moist lips against mine.  His lips touched mine and we connected in that powerful moment.  SOMETHING amazing began to travel through my entire body, and the climax was in his lips against mine.

As I laid there, by eyes began to flutter, one by one my left eye opened, as did my right.
I laid there with my eyes wide open looking deeply into his...
The alarms blared all around us, and he sat there holding me now in his arms.

Happy New Year 2016