So Brady and Moi are driving through Illinois, paying the tolls and listening to Cher, Bette Midler, and Kenny Rodgers blaring from the audio system in the red limo. All is right with the world as we drive along this unknown path that we have embarked upon.
A little known fact about Moi’s travels, anytime I indulge myself with a vacation or holiday something life changing and/or altering happens to Moi. So we shall see what unfolds…
Brady decided to take HWY 51(thinking it would be quicker) guess he wanted the scenic route?
Not really sure what the hell he was thinking? Have you ever been through Illinois? Well I have twice! “Picture It” It is Fall 2010, the leaves are changing colors, falling lazily to the ground and the air is crisp and aromatic with the smell of cow crap and the sheer boredom of driving and stopping in each little non incorporated town that we seemed to pass through. It was like someone that is attempting to learn to drive a stick shift for the first time. Start, stop, start, and stop which continued which seemed like for days(a few hours) and as we approached the end of Illinois I was feeling a bit stressed, constipated(from the sitting) hemorrhoid irritation, and at a place of mental discomfort. I was not sure if I wanted to cry or just laugh uncontrollably. Thank the heavens we are finally past all that flat land and we are approaching Kentucky, the home of The Kentucky Derby(all those cute little men) Fried Chicken…do you know that there places to eat fried chicken on every corner? Such as: Chick Fil A, The Winners, KFC, Church’s Chix, Popeye’s and a few others. Tell me how many ways can one really fry chicken? It is also known for Bluegrass, and the fact that hunka hunk of burning flesh George Clooney was born there.
Kentucky was a very enjoyable ride for us…it was short.
Before we knew it, Brady was pulling into the exciting state of Tennessee, where country songs are created by women with very large breasts(Dolly Parton) men with achy breaky hearts, and 3 cigarettes in an ash tray! The day was long and we was approaching dusk as the fabulous red limo entered Nashville! I was of course admiring all the sights and sounds of this very BIG city from the back seat of my ride. I thought at this time it would be appropriate for a change of clothing. So I pulled out my red stetson, red boots and my skin tight black Wranglers and black t-shirt…oh and my red bandanna.
We made our way to our hotel, and of course yet again I was bombarded with fans, screaming, shouting my name, pulling on my shirt, one gal even tried tweaking my right nipple! As if! I guess everyone knows of me because of my white Jackie-O’s. I really do love my fans!
The next day in Tennessee would be like nothing Moi has ever experienced!
Stay tuned…
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