There is nothing more exciting then Christmas in the Midwest! Of course Moi can only imagine Christmas in Hollywood walking up the red carpet with thousands of fans screaming my name “Divine Man Divine Man, We LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU ” sure that would make my holiday complete, or a Guest Host spot on The View or Chelsey Lately! Hell why stop there let’s do Oprah too. Hint Hint people!
Or what a holiday it would be if a Publishing House would contact Moi!
But really, the holidays in the Midwest are filled with twinkling lights, holiday markets, tom & jerry’s, holiday festivals with live reindeer, nativities, family get togethers and Tulips baking in the kitchen wiping the beads of perspiration from her brow, either from a hot flash or the oven door being opened multiple times while Big Daddy is making his annual homemade Italian Sausages.
Every year Moi’s family is all aglow with parties, birthdays(Moi’s B-day is December 17th) holiday trimming, shopping, dinners, mistletoe and kids laughing with delight, Diva Girl licking her chops at the sight of the huge bone with the red bow and her name on it!
Again there is nothing more exciting then the holidays in the Midwest I say!
Just last evening Tulips expresses to Moi her feelings about these “hot flashes” she is having. She tells me that Dr. Feel Good thinks it is just “maturity” but, Tulips thinks there has to be some relief from them? She asks Moi what I think? Moi replies with “maybe you should try not to wear undies to bed at night under your nite time moo moo” …”maybe then you will feel cooler?” And all of a sudden Big Daddy bolts from his dining room chair(more like he wobbles)screaming as he goes for the basement door “I crapped myself, I crapped myself!” and wobbles down the stairs, as Tulips and Moi ask each other: “why is he going to the basement bathroom, by the time he gets there he surely will have crap running down his legs!”
Again there is nothing more exciting then the holidays in the Midwest I say!
Moi hopes your holidays are filled with only the best memories, hot flashes, hershey squirts and all!
Make it a Divine Holiday!
No comments:
Post a Comment