A Traffic Jam, A Clear Bag and Deodorant!

As you know, Moi is simply divine, divine, divine! And gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous!

With that being said I feel compelled to share with you my Wednesday. What started out as a lovely day, especially when I peered into my magic mirror and asked…Mirror Mirror on my ceiling who is the most divine of them all? And of course my mirror replied: you are the most divine of all! After that Moi slipped into something wonderful and headed into the city to drop Tulips off at her friend Lucinda’s(remember big ass) to console her after her last breakup. It was her 18^th “breakup” of 2010. Apparently Lucinda walked in on her man kissing his garbage man while rolling around on the recyclables! And all she could utter from her lipstick smeared mouth was: just look at all that trash!

Anyways…I drop Tulips off, and arrive at Kohl’s department store and I am kind of on a time crunch. So as I walk in, I realize in all my hurry and confusion Moi realizes that I have forgot my deodorant! Can you imagine my horror? I have never forgot to put deodorant on, that would be like forgetting to wipe my ass! As they say, I am rather anal about this! HA! So I pull into the local Wal~mart and run in to get a little tiny stick of deodorant! Finally fresh relief for my silky smooth pits!

As I am leaving Wal~mart who wobbles in but Big Daddy! He is there to buy something for the dogs! However I can not stop to chat, as I am on a time crunch! So Moi flies out of the parking lot and heads to the HWY. I call one of my dearest and closest friends Jolene, whom is riding shotgun with Moi for a morning of shopping and laughs to ask her to meet me on the HWY to head to the BIG City! I arrive in a parking lot, and I think 20 minutes passed and thought…maybe Jolene is not coming, unbeknownst to Moi she was waiting a few cars over with her stud man of a husband(whom likes to walk around outside naked at night checking tire pressure) and finally we connect. And we are off!

After a lovely wonderful heartfelt morning of shopping and friendship, Moi returns Jolene to her door and proceeds to head for the HWY yet again. What normally is a 20 minute ride that is quiet and serene turns into a ride that is 1.5 hours, flames, hot cops and firefighters and detours. A barn burned down. As I was 15 minutes into the delay and detour I felt that old familiar feeling pressuring my bladder. There was no where to urinate except for a Ziploc bag I had in my car. So as I was at a stand still I decided to give myself relief into the bag, and I am so close to being done, when ….
　
A bit of advice, don’t ever pee into a clear bag, make sure it is a camouflage one.